Subject: Wife 1.0 program

rwise

Captain
Joined
Jul 5, 2001
Messages
3,205
This may have been posted before,,,,


Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. Girlfriend 7.0 came with the program Sexual Favors 2.0 and the program ran beautifully and I used it quite frequently. When I upgraded to Wife 1.0 it automatically deleted that program and I have been trying to reinstall it with no success.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....

_________________________________________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I hate to tell you this but Sexual Favors 2.0 cannot be used under the Wife 1.0 operating system but works great with Perfect Wife 3.5 which is an almost impossible program to find. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,
Tech Support
 

rwise

Captain
Joined
Jul 5, 2001
Messages
3,205
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

oh yes wife 1.0 can be deleted and replaced with girlfriend 8.0 beta, be careful it can be costly! :D
 

Dunaruna

Admiral
Joined
May 2, 2003
Messages
6,027
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

[colour=blue]Install diamond v1.1 (NOT the shareware version, zirconia 1.1), this program will take WIFE 1.0 out of resident memory temporarily but be warned, DIAMOND v1.1 requires expensive and regular updates.
 

rwise

Captain
Joined
Jul 5, 2001
Messages
3,205
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

I unistalled wife 2.0 and am now testingd versions of girlfriend 9.0 and 9.1 d:)
 

Ron G

Commander
Joined
Apr 28, 2005
Messages
2,905
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

I thought thats what the second puter is for:devil:
 

Tyme2fish

Commander
Joined
Feb 19, 2002
Messages
2,481
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

The solution is simple. Twentyeight years ago I uninstalled wife1.0. Updated to wife2.0 26 years ago and the program is still running perfectly.
 

Mr.Ladyfish

Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Nov 28, 2003
Messages
848
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

30 something years ago I installed Wife 1.0. After 2 yrs of constant problems I uninstalled the program and tried Bachelor 2.0 for a while. That program was a lot of fun but eventually became lonely so I installed Wife 2.0. Boy was that a mistake. That program became very jealous of my Harley program and kept wanting to move to Florida with In-Laws-From-Hell 2.0. When I refused the program eventually quit working and stayed in Fla.

29 years ago next month I installed Wife 3.0. The program can be a little cranky and cantankerous at times but overall has made my life much happier and easier. I have found that programming "Yes Dear", "You're Right" and "I'm Sorry" commands tend to make the program run smoother.8)
 

harkawy

Petty Officer 2nd Class
Joined
Jun 27, 2005
Messages
155
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

I installed Wife 1.0 38+ years ago. Since then the program has become self aware. It automatically pays the bills on line as well as records my favorite TV programs. To make life interesting, the program makes the sound of "ZZZZZZZZ" during the night letting me know that it is close by.

Don't you just love computers? My computer's name is "Cherry 2000."
 

91cajun

Petty Officer 3rd Class
Joined
Jul 15, 2006
Messages
76
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

I installed wife 1.0 18 years ago. Ran fine for most of the time. I think it has a virus now because I keep getting "access denied" when I try to login. :^
 

Tyme2fish

Commander
Joined
Feb 19, 2002
Messages
2,481
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

91cajun said:
I installed wife 1.0 18 years ago. Ran fine for most of the time. I think it has a virus now because I keep getting "access denied" when I try to login. :^

LMAO : Good one!!!!
 

harkawy

Petty Officer 2nd Class
Joined
Jun 27, 2005
Messages
155
Re: Subject: Wife 1.0 program

91cajun said:
I installed wife 1.0 18 years ago. Ran fine for most of the time. I think it has a virus now because I keep getting "access denied" when I try to login. :^

Did you try using a different password?
My computer sometimes changes my password to "I Love You" or "I Like What You Did With Your Hair" or "Hi! Beautiful"
Sometimes it won't accept any password and just goes into sleep mode.
 
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