SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
"UN Dinner"<br /><br />Seated next to a self inflated egotist at a United<br />Nations dinner was an Asian fellow dressed in<br />the robes of one of the Far Eastern countries.<br />The jerk, attempting to make conversation,<br />leaned over and said: "You like soupee?"<br /><br />The Asian fellow nodded his head.<br /><br />"You like steakee?"<br /><br />The Asian nodded again.<br /><br />As it turned out, the guest speaker at the dinner<br />was our Asian friend who got up and delivered a<br />beautiful 50 minute address on the United Nations'<br />definition of "encouragement to self-reliance" by<br />underdeveloped countries of the world. The<br />speech was flawless in Oxford English.<br /><br />He returned to his place at the head of the table,<br />sat down and turned to his dinner partner and<br />said, "You like speechee?" 
<br />-----------------------------------<br /><br />"Asking for Directions"<br /><br />A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at<br />a bus stop where two Americans are waiting.<br /><br />"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?"<br />he asks. The two Americans just stare at him.<br /><br />"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tries.<br />The two continue to stare.<br /><br />"Parlare Italiano?" No response.<br /><br />"Hablan ustedes Espanol?" Still nothing.<br /><br />The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted.<br />The first American turns to the second and says,<br />"Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language."<br /><br />"Why?" says the other. "That guy knew four<br />languages, and it didn't do him any good." <br /><br />You people have a good Sunday.
<br />-----------------------------------<br /><br />"Asking for Directions"<br /><br />A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at<br />a bus stop where two Americans are waiting.<br /><br />"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?"<br />he asks. The two Americans just stare at him.<br /><br />"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tries.<br />The two continue to stare.<br /><br />"Parlare Italiano?" No response.<br /><br />"Hablan ustedes Espanol?" Still nothing.<br /><br />The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted.<br />The first American turns to the second and says,<br />"Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language."<br /><br />"Why?" says the other. "That guy knew four<br />languages, and it didn't do him any good." <br /><br />You people have a good Sunday.