Bassy
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2003
- Messages
- 1,795
Once a Baptist<br />>><br />>>John Smith was the only Protestant to move into a large Catholic <br />>>neighborhood.<br />>><br />>>On the first Friday of Lent, John was outside grilling a big juicy <br />steak <br />>>on his grill.<br />>><br />>>Meanwhile, all of his neighbors were eating cold tuna fish for <br />supper.<br />>><br />>>This went on each Friday of Lent.<br />>><br />>>On the last Friday of Lent, the neighborhood men got together and <br />decided <br />>>that something had to be done about John, he was tempting them to eat <br />meat <br />>>each Friday of Lent, and they couldn't take it anymore.<br />>><br />>>They decided to try and convert John to be a Catholic.<br />>><br />>>They went over and talked to him and were so happy that he decided to <br />join <br />>>all of his neighbors and become a Catholic.<br />>><br />>>They took him to Church, and the Priest sprinkled some water over <br />him, and <br />>>said, "You were born a Baptist, you were raised a Baptist, and now <br />you are <br />>>a Catholic."<br />>><br />>>The men were so relieved, now their biggest Lenten temptation was <br />>>resolved.<br />>><br />>>The next year's Lenten season rolled around.<br />>><br />>>The first Friday of Lent came, and just at supper time, when the <br />>>neighborhood was setting down to their tuna fish dinner, came the <br />wafting <br />>>smell of steak cooking on a grill.<br />>><br />>>The neighborhood men could not believe their noses!<br />>><br />>>WHAT WAS GOING ON?<br />>><br />>>They called each other up and decided to meet over in John's yard to <br />see <br />>>if he had forgotten it was the first Friday of Lent.<br />>><br />>>The group arrived just in time to see John standing over his grill <br />with a <br />>>small pitcher of water.<br />>><br />>>He was sprinkling some water over his steak on the grill, saying, <br />"You <br />>>were born a cow, you were raised a cow, and now you are a fish."<br />>><br />>><br />>><br />>><br />>><br />>>Two Dogs<br />>><br />>>Two Irish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says to the <br />other, <br />>>"I hear that the people in this country actually eat dogs."<br />>><br />>>"Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we <br />might <br />>>as well do as the Americans do."<br />>><br />>>Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog vendor <br />and <br />>>they both walk towards the cart.<br />>><br />>><br />>><br />>>"Two dogs, please," says one.<br />>><br />>>The vendor is only too pleased to oblige and he wraps both hot dogs <br />in <br />>>foil and hands them over the counter.<br />>><br />>>Excited, the nuns hurry over to a bench and begin to unwrap their <br />"dogs."<br />>><br />>>The mother superior is first to open hers.<br />>><br />>>She begins to blush and then, staring at it for a moment, leans over <br />to <br />>>the other nun and whispers cautiously:<br />>><br />>>"What part did you get?"<br />>>
