Daily Funny(s)

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
"Fight"<br /><br />Walking into the bar Bob said to the bartender,<br />"Pour me a stiff one, Eddie. I just had another<br />fight with the little woman."<br /><br />"Oh yeah," said Eddie. "And how did this one<br /> end?"<br /><br />"When it was over," Bob replied, "she came<br />to me on her hands and knees."<br /><br />"Really? Now that's a switch! What did she<br />say?"<br /><br />"She said, 'Come out from under that bed,<br />you chicken!'"<br />______________________________________________<br /><br />"Coded Message"<br /><br />After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if<br />Saddam is still alive," Saddam decided to send<br />George W. a letter in his own writing to let his<br />enemy know that he is still in the game.<br /><br />Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain<br />a coded message:<br /><br />370HSSV-0773H<br /><br />George W. couldn't figure it out so he typed it in<br />and e-mailed Colin Powell. Colin and his aids<br />had no clue either so they sent it to the CIA.<br /><br />No one could solve it so it went to the NSA and<br />then to MIT and NASA and the cc list got longer<br />and longer. Eventually it arrived at the Feds.<br /><br />Dr. Greenspan looked at it and replied the next<br />second:<br /><br />"Perhaps the President would wish to read the<br />message up-side-down...."<br /> :D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :p <br />Have a good Sunday!!!
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
Re: Daily Funny(s)

A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at her and speaks in a clear voice.<br /><br /> "Darling," he says. "I know we've been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce." <br />The wife says nothing, keeps looking at the road<br />ahead but slowly increases her speed to 45 mph.<br /><br /> The husband speaks again. "I don't want you to try and talk me out of it,"he says, "because I've been having an affair with your best friend,<br />and she's a far better lover than you are."<br /><br /> Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly<br />and slowly increases the speed to 55. He pushes his luck. "I want the house," he says insistently. Up to 60.<br /><br /> "I want the car, too," he continues.-65 mph.<br /><br /> "And," he says, "I'll have the bank accounts, all the credit cards and the boat." The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete<br />bridge. This makes him a wee bit nervous, so he asks her: "Isn't there anything you want?"<br /><br /> The wife at last replies - in a quiet and controlled voice. "No, I've got everything I need." she says.<br /><br /> "Oh, really?" he enquires, "so what have you got?" <br />Just before they slam into the wall at 65 mph, the wife turns to him and smiles. "The airbag."<br />Ouch!!!!! :eek:
 

neumanns

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Mar 1, 2003
Messages
1,926
Re: Daily Funny(s)

"Fight" is funniest one in a long time and I had to turn my laptop over to get the next one. Glad I didnot have a desktop I proabably would not have got it! ;)
 
Top