Friday Joke

SpinnerBait_Nut · Mar 13, 2003

Just a little humor for the TGIF bunch. Enjoy

A stock broker, on his way home from work in NY City, came to a dead halt in traffic and thought to himself, "Wow, this traffic seems worse than usual. Nothing's even moving." He notices a police officer walking back and forth between the lines of cars, so he rolls down his window and asks, "Officer what's the hold up?" The officer replies, "Hillary Clinton is just so depressed about all the New Yorkers making her the butt of so many jokes, she stopped her motorcade in the middle of the freeway and she's threatening to douse herself in gasoline and set herself on fire. She says her husband is running around on her more than ever and the Democrats told her to forget about the presidency in 2004. So we're taking up a collection for her." The broker asks, "Oh really? How much have you got so far?" The officer replies "About 4 1/2 gallons, but a lot of folks are still siphoning."

KennyKenCan · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

I've got 6 gallons of premix left over from last season! That should help.

Jack Shellac · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

Good one, SBN. Thanks, I needed that.

NOSLEEP · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

A good friday morning HA! HA!

DJ · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

Another one. I hope this doesn't offend anyone. A guy goes into a store and tells the clerk, "I'd like some Polish sausage." The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would Ya, huh? Would Ya?" The clerk says, "Well, no." With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well, all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?" The clerk replies, "Because this is Home Depot."

dkondelik · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

BLAAAAAHH! notbad Thanx Guys. Tough day at the office today. I needed those

RICKRICK1 · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

Home Depot!!!!!LMAO

crab bait · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

B O Y ,, O 'BOY... if HILLARY heard that.. she'd put the SMACK-DOWN on ya for sure..

your not gonna believe ths DJ.. but the home depot by me actually sells hot dogs & sausages an such in a little stand inside the place...

SpinnerBait_Nut · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

crab bait, I wasn't gona say anything for fear of sounding stupid, but I recall seeing some kind of eating place in the home depot here at home the last time I was there.

SpinnerBait_Nut · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

One more to end the day on. Brother John entered the 'Monastery of Silence' and the chief monk said, "Brother, this is a silent monastery, you are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so." Brother John lived in the monastery for 5 years before the chief monk said to him: "Brother John, you have been here 5 years now, you may speak two words." Brother John said, "Hard Bed." "I'm sorry to hear that" the chief monk said. "We will get you a better bed." After another 5 years, Brother John was called by the chief monk. "You may say another two words Brother John." "Cold Food," said Brother John, and the chief monk assured him that the food would be better in the future. On his 15th anniversary at the monastery, the chief monk again called Brother John into his office. "What are your two words you want to say today." "I Quit." said Brother John. "I'm not surprised," said the chief monk. "You've done nothing but whine and complain since you got here."

Hooty · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

PEST CONTROL A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly. "Quick," said the woman to her lover, "into the closet!" And she pushed him in the closet, stark naked. The husband, however, became suspicious and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet. "Who are you?" he asked him. "I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone," said the exterminator. "What are you doing in there?" the husband asked. "I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths," the man replied. "And where are your clothes?" asked the husband. The man looked down at himself and said, "Those little *******s..." c/6 Hooty

ebbtide176 · Mar 14, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

rotflmao

SS MAYFLOAT · Mar 15, 2003

Re: Friday Joke

Bill Clinton was out walking his little fluffy dog one morning when a lady asked him about the pooch. Bills reply was "I got him for Hillary", the Ladies reply was "Sounds like that was a good trade"

Friday Joke

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