FLATHEAD
Captain
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2002
- Messages
- 3,510
After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame<br />sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed.<br />The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally<br />and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process.<br /> <br />After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had<br />decided to call it a day when an armless man approached him and<br />announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job.<br /><br />The bishop was incredulous. "You have no arms!"<br />"No matter," said the man. "Observe!" And he began striking the bells<br />with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon.<br /><br />The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found<br />a replacement for Quasimodo. But suddenly, rushing forward to strike<br />a bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry<br />window to his death in the street below.<br /><br />The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street,<br />a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful<br />music they had heard only moments before. As they silently parted<br />to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"<br /><br />"I don't know his name," the bishop sadly replied,.. "But his face rings a bell."<br /><br /> WAIT! WAIT! There's more..........<br />The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart<br />due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop<br />continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.<br /><br />The first man to approach him said, "Your Excellency, I am the brother<br />of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry<br />yesterday. I pray that you honor his life by allowing me to replace him<br />in this duty."<br /><br />The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's<br />brother stooped, picked up a mallet and struck the bells as beautifully as<br />his brother. But as he finished, he groaned, clutched at his chest,<br />twirled around and died on the spot.<br /><br />Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy,<br />rushed up the stairs to his side. "What has happened? Who is this man?"<br />the first monk asked breathlessly.<br /><br />"I don't know his name," sighed the distraught bishop,<br />but... he's a Dead Ringer for His Brother."
<br /><br />Snake story.....<br /><br /> Boudreaux been fish'n down by de bayou all day an he done run outa<br /> night crawlers. He be bout reddy to leave when he seen a snake wit a big<br /> frog in his mout. He knowed dat dem big bass fish like frogs so he decided<br /> to steal dat froggie. Dat snake, he be a cotton moufed water moccasin so<br />he<br /> had to be real careful or he'd get bit. He snuk up behine de snake and<br /> grabbed him roun de haid. Dat ole s! nake din't lak dat one bit. He<br />squirmed<br /> and wrapped hisself roun Boudreaux's arm try'n to get hisself free. But<br /> Boudreaux, him, had a real good grip on his haid, yeh. Well, Boudreaux<br /> pried his mout open and got de frog and puts it in his baitcan.<br /><br /> Now, Boudreaux knows dat he cain't let go dat snake or his gonna<br /> bite him good, but he had a plan. He reach into de back pocket of his bib<br /> overhauls and pulls out a pint a moonshine likker. He pour some draps into<br /><br /> de snakes mout. Well, dat snake's eyeballs roll back in his haid and his<br /> body go limp. Wit dat Boudreaux toss's dat snake into de bayou. Den he<br />goes<br /> back to fishin. A while later Boudreaux dun feel sumpin tappin on his<br /> barefoot toe. He slowly look down and dare dat water mocassin was with two<br /> frogs in his mout. 