Subject: Obituary of an old friend<br />><br />><br />><br />>>Today we mourn the passing<br />>><br />>>of a beloved old friend by the name of<br />>><br />>>Common Sense<br />>><br />>>who has been with us for many years.<br />>><br />>>No one knows for sure how old he was<br />>><br />>>since his birth records<br />>><br />>>were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.<br />>><br />>>He will be remembered<br />>><br />>>as having cultivated such value lessons as<br />>><br />>>knowing when to come in out of the rain,<br />>><br />>>why the early bird gets the worm and<br />>><br />>>that life isn't always fair.<br />>><br />>>Common Sense<br />>><br />>>lived by simple, sound financial policies<br />>><br />>>(don't spend more than you earn)<br />>><br />>>and reliable parenting strategies<br />>><br />>>(adults, not kids, are in charge.)<br />>><br />>>His health began to rapidly deteriorate<br />>><br />>>when well intentioned but overbearing regulations<br />>><br />>>were set in place.<br />>><br />>>Reports of a six-year-old boy<br />>><br />>>charged with sexual harassment<br />>><br />>>for kissing a classmate;<br />>><br />>>teens suspended from school<br />>><br />>>for using mouthwash after lunch;<br />>><br />>>and a teacher fired<br />>><br />>>for reprimanding an unruly student,<br />>><br />>>only worsened his condition.<br />>><br />>>It declined even further<br />>><br />>>when schools were required to get parental<br />>>consent<br />>><br />>>to administer aspirin to a student;<br />>><br />>>but, could not inform the parents<br />>><br />>>when a student became pregnant<br />>><br />>>and wanted to have an abortion.<br />>><br />>>Finally,<br />>><br />>>Common sense lost the will to live<br />>><br />>>as the Ten Commandments became contraband;<br />>><br />>>churches became businesses;<br />>><br />>>and criminals received better treatment<br />>><br />>>than their victims.<br />>><br />>>Common Sense finally gave up the ghost<br />>><br />>>after a woman failed to realize<br />>><br />>>that a steaming cup of coffee was hot,<br />>><br />>>she spilled a bit in her lap,<br />>><br />>>and was awarded a huge settlement<br />>><br />>>Common Sense<br />>><br />>>was preceded in death<br />>><br />>>by his parents, Truth and Trust,<br />>><br />>>his wife, Discretion;<br />>><br />>>his daughter, Responsibility;<br />>><br />>>and his son, Reason.<br />>><br />>>He is survived by two stepbrothers;<br />>><br />>>My Rights and Ima Whiner.<br />>><br />>>Not many attended his funeral<br />>><br />>>because so few realized he was gone.<br />>><br />>>If you still know him pass this on,<br />>><br />>>if not join the majority and do nothing.<br />>>