bassboy1
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2006
- Messages
- 1,884
How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is
young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying
about a stupid burned out bulb?
2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace
any wiring that's not up to code.
3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid
lamp!
4. Rottweiler: Make me.
5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my
squeaky toys in the dark.
6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change
the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please,
please, please!
7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've
led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and
make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take
advantage of the situation.
8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while
I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry,
but I don't see a light bulb!
10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee
on the carpet in the dark.
11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or "We don't
need no stinking light bulb."
12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the
light bulbs in a little circle...
14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's
ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails
will be dry.
How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?
Cats do not change light bulbs. People change
light bulbs. So, the real question is:
"How long will it be before I can expect some
light, some dinner, and a massage?"
ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS
HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF!
WHY GOD MADE PETS
They help out around the house...
They protect our children...
They look out for the smaller ones...
They show us how to relax...
They "converse" with each other.
They help you when you're down...
They are great at decorating for the Holidays.
They have "great" expectations.
They are Patriotic.
They are happy to "test" the water.
They love their "teddies"
They know who's "BOSS.
AND - They know when we need a good LAUGH!
1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is
young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying
about a stupid burned out bulb?
2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace
any wiring that's not up to code.
3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid
lamp!
4. Rottweiler: Make me.
5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my
squeaky toys in the dark.
6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change
the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please,
please, please!
7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've
led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and
make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take
advantage of the situation.
8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while
I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry,
but I don't see a light bulb!
10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee
on the carpet in the dark.
11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or "We don't
need no stinking light bulb."
12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the
light bulbs in a little circle...
14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's
ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails
will be dry.
How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?
Cats do not change light bulbs. People change
light bulbs. So, the real question is:
"How long will it be before I can expect some
light, some dinner, and a massage?"
ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS
HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF!
WHY GOD MADE PETS
They help out around the house...
They protect our children...
They look out for the smaller ones...
They show us how to relax...
They "converse" with each other.
They help you when you're down...
They are great at decorating for the Holidays.
They have "great" expectations.
They are Patriotic.
They are happy to "test" the water.
They love their "teddies"
They know who's "BOSS.
AND - They know when we need a good LAUGH!
d
