Important Virus Warning

aspeck

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
19,259
If you receive an email entitled "Bedtimes, " delete it IMMEDIATELY. Do not open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer. It demagnetizes the strips on ALL of your credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play. It will program your phone auto dial to call only 1-800 numbers. This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING. It will drink ALL of your beer.<br /><br />FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING? ? ? It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting company. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine. If the "Bedtimes" message opened in a Windows 95/98 environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your Skim milk with whole milk.<br /><br />******* WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN. *******<br /><br />And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds, you'll fart so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you,<br />sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you. Send this warning to everyone.<br /><br />IF YOU'RE A BLONDE?.........THIS IS A JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
Re: Important Virus Warning

Man aspect, I'm glad you put that last little part in there.<br /><br />There would be, eerrrrrrrrr, never mind. :D
 

Carphunter

Commander
Joined
Aug 11, 2002
Messages
2,061
Re: Important Virus Warning

Aspeck, you are showing signs of a recent alien abduction. Its ok, you can talk about it. Take it from SBN and I, we still have nightmares about the little probe thingy. And you start ..........to......... hear........... voi........ did you hear that? ......... what? .........Hello ..........is someone there? ................... Oh, its you, Captain Meedledorp, man, I was worried there for a minute. :eek:
 

gonfishn

Commander
Joined
May 16, 2002
Messages
2,390
Re: Important Virus Warning

wayyyyy to much time on your hands....
 

neumanns

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Mar 1, 2003
Messages
1,926
Re: Important Virus Warning

Made my eyes water, and my daughter is asking whats so funny. Thanks
 

LadyFish

Admiral
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
6,894
Re: Important Virus Warning

Thanks for the warning aspeck. Does this also affect those who use XP.
img99.gif
 

LadyFish

Admiral
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
6,894
Re: Important Virus Warning

LOL at SBN. I was being sarcastic since y'all have such an affinity for blonde jokes. :p ;) :D
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
Re: Important Virus Warning

Oh LF, don't get me wrong.<br />I like blondes.<br /><br />Like the one I sent you. :eek:
 

aspeck

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
19,259
Re: Important Virus Warning

I confess, it was the rain and the aliens. They always seem to come together, like some sort of symbolic convergence. And, and, and, they, uh, they, uh, okay, I will admit it, they TALK to me, uh, sometimes, sort of, you know. Not all the time, just a little, well, maybe a little more than that, but, uh, not much more. Anyway, it was all their fault! But they are gone now, at least temporarily. I sent them to OBJ's for a while. Now I can get back to work.
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
Re: Important Virus Warning

aspeck, don't blame it on my lil buddies now.<br /><br />Confess, you did that one on your own with no help except maybe from that guy in the next stall. :p
 

aspeck

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
19,259
Re: Important Virus Warning

SBN, who do you think was in the next stall?
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Aug 25, 2002
Messages
17,651
Re: Important Virus Warning

aspeck, from the content, maybe Ray? :p <br />Remember what he said about his glasses needing cleaning? :eek: <br /><br />J/K Ray, don't get all fired up now.<br />Don't need none of them ragheads on here. :D
 

aspeck

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
19,259
Re: Important Virus Warning

I was thinking it was one of them thar aliens, but maybe you are right?? Ray, was that you?
 
Top