SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
"Planting"<br /> <br />A city slicker moves to the country and decides<br />he's going to take up farming. He heads to<br />the local co-op and tells the man, "Give me<br />100 baby chickens." The co-op man complies.<br /> <br />A week later the man returns and says, "Give<br />me 200 baby chickens." The co-op man complies.<br /> <br />Again, a week later the man returns. This time<br />he says, "Give me 500 baby chickens."<br /> <br />"Wow!" the co-op man replies. "You must really<br />be doing well!"<br /> <br />"Naw," said the man with a sigh. "I'm either<br />planting them too deep or too far apart!"<br />_____________________________________________<br />"The Football Hero"<br /> <br />Larry, a local football star, is jogging down the<br />street when he sees a building on fire. A lady<br />is standing on a third story ledge holding her<br />pet cat in her arms.<br /> <br />"Hey, lady," yells Larry, "Throw me the cat."<br /> <br />"No," she cries, "It's too far."<br /> <br />"I play football, I can catch him."<br /> <br />The smoke is pouring from the windows. Finally,<br />the woman waves to Larry, kisses her cat goodbye,<br />and tosses it down to the street. Larry keeps his<br />eye on the cat as it comes hurtling down toward<br />him. The feline bounces off an awning and Larry<br />runs into the street to catch it. He jumps six feet<br />into the air and makes a spectacular one handed<br />catch. The crowd that has gathered to watch the<br />fire breaks into cheers.<br /> <br />Larry does a little dance, lifts the cat above his<br />head, wiggles his knees back and forth, then<br />spikes the cat into the pavement.<br />____________________________________________<br />Here kitty, kitty. 
