Bassy
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2003
- Messages
- 1,795
The New California Governor has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the state, rather than German which was the other possibility.<br /><br />As part of the negotiations, The Terminator's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Austro-English" (or, if nobody will be offended, "Austri-onics").<br /><br />In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make <br />the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.<br /><br />There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the <br />troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% <br />shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be <br />expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.<br /><br />Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always <br />ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the <br />silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.<br /><br />By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" <br />and "w" with "v".<br /><br />During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" <br />and after ziz fifz y er, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.<br /><br />Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu <br />understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.<br /><br />If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas it on to oza pepl. 
