deputydawg
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2004
- Messages
- 1,607
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS <br />Smart man + smart woman = romance <br />Smart man + dumb woman = affair <br />Dumb man + smart woman = marriage <br />Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy <br />______________________________ <br />OFFICE ARITHMETIC <br />Smart boss + smart employee = profit <br />Smart boss + dumb employee = production <br />Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion <br />Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime <br />_____________________________ <br />SHOPPING MATH <br />A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs. <br />A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need. <br />_____________________________ <br />GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS <br />A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. <br />A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. <br />A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. <br />A successful woman is one who can find such a man. <br />_____________________________ <br />HAPPINESS <br />To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. <br />______________________________ <br />LONGEVITY <br />Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die. <br />______________________________ <br />PROPENSITY TO CHANGE <br />A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. <br />A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. <br />_____________________________ <br />DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE <br />A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
