SlowlySinking
Master Chief Petty Officer
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2002
- Messages
- 897
Does any of this sound familar????<br /><br />There oughta be a law that stupid people should have to wear signs that say, "I'm Stupid." <br /><br />That way you wouldn't rely on them or ask for thier advice, would you? <br /><br />You wouldn't ask them anything or expect much, cuz they just can't deliver. <br /><br />It would be like, "Excuse me, could you help me...oops...never mind, I didn't see your "I'm stupid" sign." <br /><br />It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" <br />"Nope, the TV's broke, so we just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. <br />Here's your sign." <br /><br />A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch them fish?" "Well, no, we talked 'em into giving up. <br />Here's your sign." <br /><br />I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy who invented a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. It goes like this; "Alright, Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good... They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but please hold my sign, if I don't make it you may need it.<br /><br />Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, <br />looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me, what should I do?. <br />Here's your sign." <br /><br />We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. <br />A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, yells in pain and then says, "Darn that's hot!" Well now, if he'd been wearing his sign, I would have stopped him, but why bother, no brain, no pain. <br /><br />I learned to drive an 18-wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know, I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I <br />couldn't get it out, no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his <br />basic questioning ... okay...no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign...until he asked, "So, is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him <br />and said, "Actually no, I was delivering this bridge and,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, hey buddy, <br />Here's your sign." <br /><br />I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said, "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. <br />Here's your sign." <br /><br />And the best; it's 4:30 and everybody is lined up at the time clock when some nit wit walks by and says, "oh, is it time to go home?" "Well, hell no, were waiting to punch in early tomorrow".<br /><br />Anybody you know need a sign today? <br /><br />Send this to all your friends. The <br />next time someone says something stupid ask them where their sign is. 
