SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
"Marriage Tidbits"<br /><br />A couple was having a discussion about family<br />finances. Finally the husband exploded, "If it<br />weren't for my money, the house wouldn't be<br />here!"<br />His wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your<br />money, I wouldn't be here." 
<br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate<br />your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law<br />better than I like mine." <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />Boring husband: "Honey, why are you wearing<br />your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"<br />Bored wife: "Because I married the wrong man! <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />A man rushed home from work and exclaimed to<br />his wife, "Pack your bags, I've won the lottery!"<br />His wife asked excitedly, "Should I pack clothes<br />for cold or warm weather?"<br />He replied, "Pack'em all, you're leaving!" <br /><br />A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband<br />leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.<br />The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she<br />leaned over too much, fell into the well, and<br />drowned. The husband was stunned, but then<br />smiled, "Wow! It really works!" <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />Her husband has been slipping in and out of a<br />coma for several months, yet she stayed by his<br />bedside every single day. When he came to, he<br />motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by<br />him, he said, "You know what? You have been<br />with me all through the bad times. When I got<br />fired, you were there to support me. When my<br />business failed, you were there. When I got<br />shot, you were by my side. When we lost the<br />house, you gave me support. When my health<br />started failing, you were still by my side. When<br />I think about it now, I think you bring me bad luck!" <br /><br />__________________________________________________<br />"B-reast Milk"<br /><br />A question had appeared in an examination which<br />read, "Give four uses of b-reast milk?" A student<br />began to answer the question.<br /><br />1. No need to boil.<br /><br />2. Cats can't steal them.<br /><br />3. Available whenever necessary.<br /><br />But the fourth point eluded him. When there<br />were barely a couple of minutes for the exam<br />to close the much required fourth point flashed<br />to his mind.<br /><br />So he completed the answer by writing:<br /><br />4. Available in attractive containers.
<br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate<br />your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law<br />better than I like mine." <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />Boring husband: "Honey, why are you wearing<br />your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"<br />Bored wife: "Because I married the wrong man! <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />A man rushed home from work and exclaimed to<br />his wife, "Pack your bags, I've won the lottery!"<br />His wife asked excitedly, "Should I pack clothes<br />for cold or warm weather?"<br />He replied, "Pack'em all, you're leaving!" <br /><br />A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband<br />leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.<br />The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she<br />leaned over too much, fell into the well, and<br />drowned. The husband was stunned, but then<br />smiled, "Wow! It really works!" <br />~*~*~*~*~*~*<br /><br />Her husband has been slipping in and out of a<br />coma for several months, yet she stayed by his<br />bedside every single day. When he came to, he<br />motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by<br />him, he said, "You know what? You have been<br />with me all through the bad times. When I got<br />fired, you were there to support me. When my<br />business failed, you were there. When I got<br />shot, you were by my side. When we lost the<br />house, you gave me support. When my health<br />started failing, you were still by my side. When<br />I think about it now, I think you bring me bad luck!" <br /><br />__________________________________________________<br />"B-reast Milk"<br /><br />A question had appeared in an examination which<br />read, "Give four uses of b-reast milk?" A student<br />began to answer the question.<br /><br />1. No need to boil.<br /><br />2. Cats can't steal them.<br /><br />3. Available whenever necessary.<br /><br />But the fourth point eluded him. When there<br />were barely a couple of minutes for the exam<br />to close the much required fourth point flashed<br />to his mind.<br /><br />So he completed the answer by writing:<br /><br />4. Available in attractive containers. 
