SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
Top ten indicators that a redneck has been working on your computer<br /><br />10. The monitor is up on blocks.<br /><br />9. Outgoing faxes have tobacco stains on them. <br /><br />8. The six front keys have rotted out. <br /><br />7. The extra RAM slots have truck parts installed in them. <br /><br />6. The numeric keypad only goes up to six. <br /><br />5. The password is "Huntin". <br /><br />4. The CPU has a gun rack mount. <br /><br />3. There is a Skoal can in the CD-ROM drive. <br /><br />2. The keyboard is camouflaged. <br /><br />1. The mouse is referred to as a "critter". <br />_________________________________________________<br /><br />So a guy and his wife arrive from a business trip and go to his favorite steakhouse unaware of the mad cow outbreak in his town. <br /> <br />The waiter seats them and says, "Our special today is duck or shrimp." <br /> <br />The man replies, "I want a T-bone steak medium well." The waiter, a bit miffed continues, "What about the mad cow?" <br /> <br />The man looks at the waiter and says, "She can order for herself"<br />_________________________________________________<br /><br />"Flying Solo"<br /><br />A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool and<br />show who was boss on the aviation frequencies. So,<br />this was his first time approaching a field during the<br />nighttime. Instead of making any official requests to<br />the tower, he said: "Guess who?"<br /><br />The controller switched the field lights off and replied:<br />"Guess where!"<br />________________________________________________<br /><br />"Threatening Letters"<br /><br />The fellow stormed into the postmaster's office<br />in a fury. "I've been getting threatening letters in<br />the mail for months and I want them stopped."<br /><br />"Of course," said the postmaster. "Sending<br />threatening letters through the mail is a federal<br />offense. Do you know who's sending them?"<br /><br />"Yes," shouted the man. "It's those idiots down<br />at the Internal Revenue Service."
