mikeandronda
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- May 13, 2003
- Messages
- 1,888
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods. <br /><br />On a Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." Gee that's the only time I have to work on my hair.) <br /><br />On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (The shoplifter special) <br /><br />On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how ...?) <br /><br />On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But its "just" a suggestion) <br /><br />On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!) <br /><br />On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .) <br /><br />On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?) <br /><br />On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) <br /><br />On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.) <br /><br />On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?) <br /><br />On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.) <br /><br />On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.) <br /><br />On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: Fly Delta.) <br /><br />On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame parents for this one.)