Wednesday Funnies

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

A couple of Blonde moments.<br />__________________________________________________<br />"How Fast?"<br /><br />A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell<br />me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to<br />New York City?"<br /><br />The agent replies, "Just a minute..."<br /><br />"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.<br />__________________________________________________<br />"Road Signs"<br /><br />Signs warning of closed roadways are frequently<br />ignored in rural Minnesota, so highway workers<br />barely took notice when a woman drove past<br />their sign and over the hill to the trench they had<br />dug in the middle of the road.<br /><br />The workers explained the detour route to town,<br />and she went on her way.<br /><br />They were surprised, however, to see the same<br />woman coming toward them from town a couple<br />of hours later. "Oh," she said distractedly as she<br />again pulled up next to the trench crew. "Is it<br />closed in this direction, too?"<br />__________________________________________________<br />Get the signs for them 2.

 

[JB]

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[KennyKenCan]

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[JGREGORY]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

Now thats funny except that it's true.<br /><br />We were closing a bridge one day and the proceedure is signs and the beginning of the road and at the last possible place to turn aroung a barricade goes into the road anchored by a sign.<br /><br />Now there is nothing beyond that barrier for people to go. Well we are cabling off the bridge with barrels and barricades when this mercedes comes down the road. She stops and sits at the barricade looking at us closing the bridge. When finally I walk over to see if I could help her. She replies she would like to cross the bridge. I told her the bridge was closed and the asked if she saw the signs, knowing full well that she had to drive around them (or over them) .<br /><br />She replies. "Yes I saw them, but thought they didn't apply to me!

 

[one more cast]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.<br />> While playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he<br />> looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?"<br />> Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit<br />> in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The TV evangelists keep me<br />company<br />> and make me feel so good. The comedies make me laugh. I'm so happy with my<br />TV<br />> as my boyfriend."<br />> Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started<br />> adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated,<br />> she started banging on the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem.<br />> The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door,<br />and<br />> there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello, son, is your<br />> grandma home?"<br />> The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her<br />> boyfriend." The minister fainted.......

 

[Kenneth Brown]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

OMC- And the wedsday funny went poof!

 

[NOSLEEP]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

excellent

 

[KennyKenCan]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

Now that's funny OMC!!

 

[Elmer Fudge]

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[SpinnerBait_Nut]

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"Tight Pants"<br /><br />This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring<br />at a blonde wearing the tightest pants he's ever<br />seen. Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so<br />he walks over and asks, "How on Earth do you get<br />into those pants?"<br /><br />The young woman looks him over and replies,<br />"Well, you could start by buying me a drink."

 

[RICKRICK1]

Re: Wednesday Funnies

TOO MUCH