What I have taught my daughter to say

[cpj]

I have 2 little girls.One is 4, the other is 1.I know that one day they will be bringing some hairy legged boy home that wants to date them.I know that its a few years off,but I thought that I would teach my girls early.So,I have taught the 4 year old to say:<br /><br /><br />"My daddy has alot of guns,alot of knives, and alot of places to bury bodies!"<br /><br />I hope that scares off a few of those hairy legged boys anyway!Man I dread the day that she wants to go on a date.Its not that I am so much worried about how she will act, but how the boys will.Cause I remember the days when I was that hairy legged boy......

 

[one more cast]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

LOL cpj, I have two daughters both now in their 20's. Intimidating boy friends in one of the many pleasures of being a Dad.

 

[cpj]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

Yea OMC, I figure Ill be sitting at the table with some camo overalls(with no shirt on)cleaning my guns.When the boy (and thats how he will be refered to during our little"talk" )comes in, I figure that I will work the action of my pump shotgun a few times,and tell him how good of a shot I am.

 

[Barbee Q]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

That is a real good one...<br /><br />You should have a few targets on the table and a something dead with a streight shot to the head.. And tell the boy that you shot it at 200 yards..<br />Then ask him what he thinks...<br />I'm sure he'll be really nice and watch his pee's-n-Q's..<br /><br />Hey, cpj do you know how to throw a hatchet.. Take the young lad to the barn and show him some skills...That will get their attention quickly.. I used to be able to throw sharp objects really good and one day I showed the neighbor boy, the simple rules of life on our property and what happens if he mess's up.. I tossed the hatchet at the barn and it perfactly went right between the open cracks.. I really didn't plan it that way, but the boy was quite impressed..

 

[roscoe]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

cpj, you need to video tape her saying that, and then play it for the boyfriend she brings home in 12 years.<br /><br />Will send him a message, and make her happy too.

 

[PW2]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

LOL<br /><br />My two girls are 24 and 29, and I feel your pain.<br /><br />If yours are anything like mine, by age 13 or so, they pretty much know everything that can be known, and they are never shy about explaining this to you.<br /><br />Imagine my shock when they learned and explained to me that boys don't always really truly mean exactly what they say...<br /><br />These days, after they turned 22 or so, they still know everything that can be known, but it is somewhat reassuring that they actually do know some things.<br /><br />After a bit of investigation, I found out that under our quaint system of government, stray bodies deposited around the property can cause some nosy government officials to ask awkward questions at times, and potentially can get a person in trouble.<br /><br />Unfortunate accidents can be a useful tool, if not overused, however.<br /><br />Good Luck

 

[Frankhanhart]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

Remember one time my daughter brought home some hairy-legged and ****le faced specimen and asked me -out of earshot- to do the " what's your Dad's occupation" and " Are your intentions honourable" routine, because on the way home she'd decided she didn't like him. At other times she asked me to drop her off at school on the motor-bike (Suzi 1100 F GSX)..." but please keep your helmet on!!". As the softy I am, I did all this because...who can fathom a girls mind ?

 

[rolmops]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

My oldest girl knows so exactly what she wants,that I pray for a man to come and take her away.At the same time I pity the poor bugger,because he does not know what is in store for him.

 

[Parrott_head]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

My favorite thing is to take my big chef's knife and a steel and start honing the knife. I can make the steel sing!! And I don't even have to keep my eyes on it. As I talk to the victim if he shows any nervousness I quicken the pace. I slow down as he thinks and speed up as he talks.

 

[f_inscreenname]

Re: What I have taught my daughter to say

I think the one that scared me the most as a teenager was when a father of a date handed me a clean glass of water and as soon as I took a drink he picked it up carefully by the edges and said, "if my daughter is five minuets late I will be handing this over to the cops." That date ended very early.