LubeDude
Admiral
- Joined
- Oct 8, 2003
- Messages
- 6,945
ARE YOU A DEMOCRAT, REPUBLICAN OR A REDNECK?<br /><br />Here is a little test that will help you decide. How would you respond<br />to <br />the following situation?:<br /><br />You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small<br />children.<br /><br />Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the<br />corner, <br />locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the<br />knife, <br />and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an<br />expert <br />shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.<br /><br />What do you do?<br /><br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />Democrat's Answer:<br /><br />Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!<br /><br />Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him<br />that <br />would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife<br />think? <br />What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and<br />knock <br />the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?<br />Does<br /><br />the glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a<br />loaded<br /><br />gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my<br /><br />children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he <br />definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If<br />I <br />were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he<br />was <br />stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We<br />need<br /><br />to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier,<br />healthier<br /><br />street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I<br /><br />need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come to a <br />consensus.<br /><br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />Republican's Answer: BANG!<br /><br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />Redneck's Answer:<br /><br />BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!<br /><br />BANG! Click..... (sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! <br />BANG! BANG! BANG!BANG! Click ... Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were<br /><br />those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"<br /><br />Son: "You got him Pop! Can I shoot the next one?"<br /><br />Wife: "You are not taking that to the Taxidermist!"
