Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Bassy

Bassy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
1,795
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

I don't know what kind of recourse you're talking about. The person is my Dad and my Mom decided to stay with him after being told what he had done for all of my young life. Yes, the whole family knows. To see them I have to be around him. It's difficult, but that's the only way it seems. <br /> I do take comfort that God will give him his punishment. So, justice will be served.<br /> Thanks for the support.
 
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ebbtide176

Commander
Joined
Jan 22, 2002
Messages
2,289
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

bassy, i admire your courage to share that and your strength to endure the get togethers. its hard to give my opinion, because i sometimes understand the reasons of both sides of a problem. but i probably would have avoided contact of any kind (even similar location) with someone who traumatized me - if i weren't able to deal with the situation peacefully(internally). it kinda sounds like you accepted it, but didn't like it. i don't think i could have been anywhere near that person, but you put up with it. so i am impressed with your emotional strength. i'm sorry, and i hope the best for you. :) <br /><br />maybe RossJ will add some helpful thoughts here also.
 
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NOSLEEP

Commander
Joined
Oct 30, 2002
Messages
2,442
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

I have to line up with ebb Bassy,You must be very <br />strong and courageous. I see that you do not live<br />under the same roof as your father which can help<br />to limit your discomfort.What I meant by recourse<br />was that I would think in this day and age you <br />could have some protection from being in that kind<br />of enviroment. I dont know your age, and that will<br />have some bearing on the kind of help that may be<br />avalible for you.
 
Bassy

Bassy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
1,795
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Dear ebb& NOSLEEP ,<br /> Thank you for you thoughts and advice. I could have used someone like you when I was a teenager.<br /> I left home in 1982(18 yrs.) Off to college(CSUF) and got away from home(250 miles away from there.) I shut out my parents for 4 years and realized that I was missing out on so much from the rest of the family. I missed them. So, I let myself back in and here I am 10 years later... back to the same ol' feelings. " My Dad is the same ol' a**hole and my Mom is the same ol' "doormat", and I am the same ol' ? <br /> I want my family, but not him!<br /> My husband knows all of my history and will not see my family because of the hurt they have done to me. <br /> So, here is my life story! Can anyone help me with this??
 
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JGREGORY

Lieutenant
Joined
Jun 1, 2003
Messages
1,412
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Bassy,<br />I admire your courage and resolve. What you are doing takes a lot of guts. I think everybody else here has said everything that could be said. <br /><br />As for advise, From what I have read you have a smart head on your shoulders and there really is not much more that can be done. I realize you love your family but you also have your own family now maybe put the priority there and basiclly write off your mom and dad. Harsh, Yeah, but at least the stress in your life is diminished. <br /><br />A long time ago I was also abused by a Friend of a Friend, I was so ashamed I have never told anybody but my wife. I found out about 15 years ago that other boys he was molesting finally complained to the police. He was sentenced to two, 25 years in jail. He never made it passed 2 somebody killed him in the yard. :D Time eventually heals all wounds, Although I still have a very strong opinion about Gays and *********s. <br /><br />You know it is your house if there is family dear to you invite them over on your ground where you feel comfortable. There is no law as to which family members you have to associate with.<br /><br />God bless you and stay strong.
 
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lakeman1999

Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Apr 20, 2003
Messages
550
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

To those who think that Qu**rs are not sick, and perverted, have you ever seen one of their Qu**r parades in san francisco (Qu**r town), or new york (ditto)? Or seen a large gathering of them? Or visited a Qu**r bar (which we used to do for kicks). If you do not think they are sick and perverted, just go to Google, and make a search for Qu**r forums, and read the postings and threads. Why did the law used to stake out public toilets, and make arrest (often of prominent persons) making advances to any one coming in, and no doubt preying on children. They are drawn to positions, and occupations that will put them in close touch with children, such as nurses, church youth leaders, coaches, teachers, scout leaders, and amusement parks. I suppose they are thr only types that like to hang out, and lounge in public toilets. :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
 
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NOSLEEP

Commander
Joined
Oct 30, 2002
Messages
2,442
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Bassy, I know how your husband may feel,as some<br />one I know, and care for very much has had to <br />endure a similar childhood experience which has<br />followed her all her life.I can not no the pain<br />that she has endured, but I can share some of her<br />thoughts.<br />As time has passed, she has learned to accept the<br />fact that recurring feelings of guilt, brought on<br />by the thought that some how it was her fault,or<br />If she had done this or that differently than <br />these things might not of occurred, Time and<br />maturity has taught her that those feelings are<br />wrong and this has helped her to accept the past<br />yet free her from any guilt she has had to carry<br />and endure.She is extremely happy now with family<br />of her own, and very protective of her children.<br />I know that this is a feeble effort at trying to<br />explain what her thoughts are or where. Knowing<br />that you can not change the past, yet you can<br />get comfort from getting a better understanding<br />of it, can help you to move past it, and focus on<br />the bright future you have will help you to deal<br />with it.
 
Bassy

Bassy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
1,795
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

You guys are just so awesome!! <br /> After the last visit with my parents and the last few e-mails from them it will be a long time before I see them again. So, that'll help me alot.<br />I believe I need to stay away. Even my husband can see the strain I feel just knowing I'll be seeing them.<br />Thanks you all.
 
Bassy

Bassy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
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Messages
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Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Yes, I'm a SHE.<br />And thank you,LadyFish!<br />Bassy
 
bubbakat

bubbakat

Captain
Joined
Oct 29, 2002
Messages
3,110
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

opps wrong topic sorry
 
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plywoody

Senior Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Aug 11, 2002
Messages
685
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Sorry to hear about your situation, Bassy. Unfortunately, it is all too common. Counselling might be an option, but then I personally think it only helps the counsellors. Years ago, I used to date a girl that had been abused by her older brother, and she would be fine for a time, and then for some unknown reason, just have flashbacks that were frightening to her. I'm not sure they will ever go away.<br /><br />While I have zero sympathy with this priest, I must admit I am surprised that no one has mentioned the real evil person in this whole episode, and that is the Bishop(s) that kept reassinging this preist (and others) to different parrishes where he could prey on other kids. You can make a case for Geoghan being just sick, but the actions of the Bishops were calculated, and without regard to the welfare of their parishoners, especially the young ones who had no recourse.<br />I find no possible excuse for this behaviour, and if it is not criminal, it sure ought to be.
 
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NOSLEEP

Commander
Joined
Oct 30, 2002
Messages
2,442
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

Yes, something I can agree with. The Bishops <br />perpetuate the problem, and it wouldn't surprise<br />me in the least, if they weren't partakers in the<br />same activity at one time or another.
 
Bassy

Bassy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
1,795
Re: Father John "the child molester" Geoghan Dead

plywoody ,<br /> You are so right. In my family( 5 kids, 3 boys and 2 girls) 2 girls were molested. I've asked my brothers and they say it didn't happen to them. More interesting is this: Oldest brother's wife was raped by her step-dad and reported him, testified and sent his a** to jail, second oldest brother's wife was molested by her Dad. Sexual abuse is so common. So sad!<br /> I have the same flashbacks. I had them really bad when I was in my early 20's. I would see his face when I was with a guy. It was really terrible. Now memories pop up out of the blue. <br />I was in an incest therapy group for 2 years and it helped some. It's just an everyday battle. Most days are good though. Just need to find a way to not think about it. I'm learning.<br />Bassy
 
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