my GPS

[nwcove]

GPS Poem



I have a little GPS
I've had it most my life
It's better than the normal ones
My GPS is my wife

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's sixty k's an hour", it says
"You're doing sixty five"

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.

I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice.

It fills me up with counseling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And - lets me have a shed.

Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I do wish that once in a while
I could turn the darn thing off.

 

[gm280]

Re: my GPS

GPS Poem



I have a little GPS
I've had it most my life
It's better than the normal ones
My GPS is my wife

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's sixty k's an hour", it says
"You're doing sixty five"

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.

I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice.

It fills me up with counseling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And - lets me have a shed.

Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I do wish that once in a while
I could turn the darn thing off.

nwcove, your better half doesn't read these comments does she? :facepalm:

 

[nwcove]

Re: my GPS

nwcove, your better half doesn't read these comments does she? :facepalm:

lol...yes she does! we do have "free" health care up here ya know!

 

[gm280]

Re: my GPS

Hope you don't need to use it any time soon... :laugh:

 

[southkogs]

Re: my GPS

Bravissimo :hail:

 

[sam60]

Re: my GPS

Well done nwcove. Does your GPS have it's (her) own passenger side brake pedal like mine?

 

[Grub54891]

Re: my GPS

:laugh:

 

[Jeep Man]

Re: my GPS

My initial thought was copy and email this to her computer. Then I considered the uncomfortable quiet I'd experience for the next week or so which I would have time to reflect on what a stupid thing I'd done.

 

[rbh]

Re: my GPS

Just called the wife into read this, I got a HA HA, then she went back to finish off the dishes and start breakfast.


No problems, LOL

 

[Tnstratofam]

Re: my GPS

OMG that is a perfect description of the GPS system I met 6 years ago. I tested the system for three years before I committed to my life long purchase. The one thing my GPS has that wasn't listed in the beautifully eloquent description from above is a field activated physical reminder to my right arm when I am not following it's directions to the letter.:boxing: Sometimes said reminder is aimed to the back of the head for extra emphasis.:doh: Deservedly so I might ad.:facepalm:

 

[kenmyfam]

Re: my GPS

A good read and funny.