Re: Who likes being mairred?
Re: Who likes being mairred?
What do you guys have for advice for us unmarried folks.. i know im still young and im not expecting to marry anyone anytime soon.. but i went out with this girl for more than a year. i was a little too controlling and i wasn't really acting my age.. well she left me for a couple months and ive realized alot since than. well weve been talking more and more and hung out the other day and she told me that she wants to give it another try. but theres another guy that she kinda likes too.. i wanna be with her. but not sure what to do.. man maybe i should go talk to dr phil.
I can talk only for myself.
It takes, on both sides, a large amount of trust, respect, and personal freedom. Back "in the day", if I really wanted to go out with the guys, no problem. Same for her (i.e. go out with the girls). We each know when to give in to the other. She does all the cooking and cleaning, mainly 'cause she's a lot better than I am. I do offer to help out and it is appreciated. I am responsible for taking out the trash, replacing the TP on the roller (don't ask), and lawn mowing. She paints the interior and I help wallpapering. We understand each others limitations and know when ask "can I help."
As to your current situation, you really need to find out what the other has that you don't. You and she need to talk.
My son, being a typical boy, dated a ton of girls and he went for looks rather than substance. In college, there was an ex-girl friends club that his sister pretty much presided over. He remained friends with just about all of them. When he graduated, he left for a job with Boat/US in DC. That lasted about a year and he moved back home, just long enough to find another job and his own apartment. He didn't like coming home to an empty apartment, had no one to share his witty and pithy commentaries, etc. He started to date one of his old girl friends and before long, they got married. Yes, there was some early problems (the boy has borderline OCD), but we talked about what was really important to him and now everything is good.
Some people like their space, and that is okay. Some like having something other than a dog or cat to talk to and share experiences, good and bad. Marriage isn't for everyone. I don't have a problem with "moving in together." It gives some time to work out the kinks. But then, I believe that marriage should be a life long commitment, and that takes work.
Sorry for the ramble.
