What to do now???

[FLATHEAD]

I just had a visit from my pop. He came in and we had a nice conversation, all was well till my mom pipes up and says "Pop wants to make a deal with you" I am thinking UH OH this is gonna be good. He says to me " you know that boat of yours" I say "yeah" He says "hows that motor run" I say "Fine why do you ask?" He says "I want to take it to Canada this spring for the annual fishin trip, My boat is not fast enough" At that my heart just jumped up into my throat!!!! You see my pop is now 72 he has had a stroke and he just is not as sharpe as he once was. Him and his boys, all over the age of 70 go every year to Canada fishing. <br /><br />Last year my 22 year old went along, this is his account of the trip. All the way up the trailer was half on the shoulder,out on the lake he ran the boat aground on three different occasions, he ran the boat up on rocks two times, once my boy had to get out in water up to his neck to push them out. He got lost on the lake within site of the cabin. He ran the boat into some overhanging branches while trying to get pictures of bear, he had line wrapped around the prop everyday, etc, etc, I think you get the picture. Thank goodness it was his boat, he was wondering why it leaked so much <br /><br />Don't get me wrong I love my pop to death and he always took me fishin and huntin. But I really don't want him to use my boat, but it looks like I will have to. The thing is I have just about enough money saved up to buy land upstate for a huntin cabin. The possability of having to buy a new boat would put a serious damper on those plans. He does have his own boat,, but how do you say no without hurting his feelings?<br /><br />Dont even suggest that he should not even go,(which he shouldnt) wild horses could not keep him from going.

 

[mellowyellow]

Re: What to do now???

tuff one flathead... maybe you can look into a<br />rental boat for him up there? you prob. feel like<br />he did when you asked to borrow his car when you<br />were 16 at least a 70yr old won't drive it like<br />he stold it. LOL

 

[boatingfool]

Re: What to do now???

Maybe go with him??<br /><br />Or find someone a little more able to drive the boat.<br /><br />Make some plans with your boat for the same time frame and tell him you forgot you already had made plans for that week.<br /><br />Have you had any shop work you have been needing on it??<br />Have it scheduled for that week.<br /><br />You said he had a deal for you.<br /><br />He wants to use your boat.<br /><br />So what do you get in return??

 

[FLATHEAD]

Re: What to do now???

LOL MY thats the scarey thing. The boat he has will not even get on plain and he did all that stuff with it. Horrors when I think about what he could do with my boat. <br /><br />Boatingfool thats the best part,,, I get to use his boat when he is gone

 

[mellowyellow]

Re: What to do now???

be a good son and rent him a nice slow pontoon<br />for the week... cheaper than the alternative.<br />and he don't have to trailer it all that way up<br />either. instead of saying no, you give him a gift.

 

[boatingfool]

Re: What to do now???

How far of a drive is it??<br /><br />Tell him you have a wheel bearing that started making some noise and you dont think it should be towed that far.<br /><br />Tell him no and blame it on your wife.

 

[gonfishn]

Re: What to do now???

I like MellowYellows idea..Either that or invest in some bumper guards..Tough call there FH..

 

[POINTER94]

Re: What to do now???

Well you can figure on about say $500 in damage to your boat???? Offer to upgrade his current power plant and avoid the question for years to follow. Tell him it is his christmas, birthday, fathersday, fourth of july, arbor day, and Martin Luther King day present for the next 3 years.<br /><br />And I would recommend doing it without telling him. It is always better to beg forgiveness than ask permission.

 

[JB]

Re: What to do now???

Ahoy, Flahthead.<br /><br />Hmmm. Where does Dad go with his cronies? Sounds like a lake about as safe as Lake Of The Woods, where I go every summer.<br /><br />I feel for you, but I feel for your Dad, too. I'm not 72 yet, but it seems just around the corner.<br /><br />My 38 year old son and his 15 year old son are my fishing cronies. They go with me every year, but that is the only time they go with me.<br /> <br />I now consider myself too old and fragile to safely launch and retrieve by myself, and have my son operate the boat most of the time. It is down to one trip a year for me and I am seriously asking why I have multiple thousands of bux in a boat to haul it 1500 miles, fish for a week, haul it back and let it sit for a year.<br /><br />I haven't had any strokes (that I know of), but I have had three heart attacks and a perforated ulcer. Getting old sux enough, but the thought of giving up my favorite pastime sux in spades.<br /><br />I am considering selling my big water boat and have a guide take us out each day from now on. I will keep a little one for fishing local puddles.<br /><br />Now, after all that, here are my points:<br /><br />1. Dad is no longer safe to operate his own boat. Tell him to sell it and hire a guide. He can split the cost with his buddies.<br /><br />2. Letting him take your boat would be contributing to the delinquency of a Granpa. Tell him no. It's no fun for either of you, but it's your turn to look out for his safety.<br /><br />Good luck.

 

[jim phillips]

Re: What to do now???

JB has given the best advice that can be given

 

[Ralph 123]

Re: What to do now???

Hi Dad? Hi it's me Flathead. Guess what? The **** engine blew on my boat. Yup. Black smoke everywhere. Oil squirting 50 ft in the air. Guess you're gonna have to make due with your boat....<br /><br />Sometimes a little white lie is best all around. You save your boat and probably him from harm by being in faster boat.<br /><br />I know telling him he shouldn't be boating, etc, is the honest thing to do, but if your mom still thinks he is ok he is never going to listen to you telling him he isn't I recon.

 

[ebbtide176]

Re: What to do now???

man i really feel for you on this predicament, its the pits. i wish you could just handle it like JB wrote, if not then what RS mentioned. if not, then you know you'll have to get him into a rental, or at least put a prop/skeg guard on that motor so you can sleep at night. good luck

 

[LubeDude]

Re: What to do now???

If by some chance you let him use your boat, make sure your insurance is good in canada! Some arnt!! I feel for ya!

 

[11 footer]

Re: What to do now???

If I where you I'd try to go with him. That way you could drive your boat and trailer your boat. He'll prolbey enjoy being with you.<br /><br />Its very hard when someone that you love gets to that stage in there life. It happend with my grandma and we had a hard time getting her to give up driveing.<br /><br />I don't know about some of you guys, lieing to him is not the answer!! I couldn't do that to my dad.<br /><br />One way or another, you shouldn't let him use your boat.<br /><br />For the record,<br />What kind of boat do you have?<br />What kind of boat does he have?

 

[JasonJ]

Re: What to do now???

I guess you can look at it from the standpoint of if he let you use any of his valuable things when you were an inexperienced kid. If he tossed you the boat keys when you were 12, or let you drive his car when you were 15, then I guess you can let him use the boat. If he was a hard arse and didn't let you use his valuable stuff until you were old enough to be "responsible", then you don't owe it to him. Its a hard call, but if it were me, unless he had the money to repair/replace the boat, I wouldn't let him use it. I guess it also depends on your own priorities of inanimate objects over family. Good luck either way. Odds are nothing bad will happen, but if it eats you up thinking about him using it more than it eats you up thinking about disappointing him, don't let him use it.

 

[FLATHEAD]

Re: What to do now???

Some good ideas here. I like the rental boat. I would be more than happy to pay for it. The guide thing makes a lot of sense also. <br /><br />Jb You gave good advice. He would never admit that he could not go out fishing in his boat any longer. His boat is a 14 foot aluminum with a 2 stroke 9.9 johnny on it. Just enough to get him in trouble but not a lot of boat to handle. Some how he always come out of his predicaments unscathed, but I do worry about him a lot. I cant force him to quit boating though I would like to.<br /><br /> The thought has crossed my mind to pull the old broke engine bit with him. It just may come to that we will see. Another thought was to rig a Governor on the thing, but he worked on heavy equipment of all his life and would figure that out in no time. Besides there still is the hull to worry about.<br /><br /> My rig is not a real big boat at all. Its just a 14 foot aluminum sylvan console fishin boat with an 28 spl. But its all I got. It does get up on plane and move along pretty nicely, enough to cause some real harm if things go south.<br /><br />Right now all I can hope for is that they change their minds. I am going try to convince them to cancel the Canada trip and go with me and the boys to Black lake instead this spring.<br /><br />Jason It eats me up thinking he could harm himself or someone else. That is a Major concern.<br />And of course I worry about my boat, like I said he always seems to come out without a scratch.

 

[pjc]

Re: What to do now???

So far, as I see it, JBs deal of getting a guide or charter is the most responsible option.<br /><br />Next, does your father really mean, Son, I'd love for you to go fishing with me. I ain't got lottsa years left--lets go Son.<br /><br />Lastly, a real good heart to heart with your Dad is, imo, in order. May be tougher than snot, but????<br /><br />Best to you Flahthead.<br />Pat

 

[Skinnywater]

Re: What to do now???

If the safety issue is the major concern then enlist moms help?<br /><br />Or talk your dad into buying a larger engine for his boat.

 

[bob58]

Re: What to do now???

I'm thinking a 15 or 20 hp from your local dealer on a trial basis (rental) is in order.<br />Put it on your dads boat and he has got the speed he is looking for.<br />Make sure there is insurance on the rental to cover liability and damages just incase.<br />Pop's gets the speed he wants and your boat is safe.<br /><br />Either that or time to clear your schedule for that week and you are the Chaufeur(sp) and guide!<br /><br />I don't know about you but I stopped lying to my folks many years ago and I am not going to go there over a vehicle or anything else.....Life is to short and getting caught and trying to make ammends for getting caught is to much work!!!

 

[Ralph 123]

Re: What to do now???

I'd rather BS my old dad than let him use a boat that may get him injured or worse. I assume that's the real issue here. You can't stop him but you don't have to arm him. And if you're worried about a falling out, watch the one that will happen if you tell him he is incapable of handling the boat. To do something like that takes a host of people, not one lonely voice. JMHO. I know how tough it was with my Gradfather many years back.