Re: What to do now???
Hi,<br /><br />Have you considered that perhaps your Pops was out of line even asking to borrow the boat. Certainly where I come from it is not custom or practice to lend out "assets". This would include, auto's, boats, caravans and often hand tools and money. There are obvious and good reasons for this, they will make bad friends of good, ex relatives of current ones. I know he's your pops and there must be mixed emotions.<br /><br />I think that if one chooses to lend things then one must not expect to get them back in the same condition or sometimes ever. I have learnt, my son now has to come to my house if he want to use any of my tools or I accompany them to his and help him. <br /><br />What your Pops has done is to inadvertantly place you under huge moral pressure which is now bringing on the guilt. Never make any decision based on guilt, the whole basis (in my opinion) of the decision will be wrong.<br /><br />A couple of other suggestions;<br /><br />a) I like Skinnywaters idea. Enlist the help of your mom. If you are married you will know the pressure wives are able to exert in a relationship. She will find it far easier to tell him to withdraw his request that you will find it to say no.<br /><br />b) If this fails (which I doubt) then I think you owe it to him to tell him that you are not comfortable with the idea and that your answer is no. "In a time of universal deceit, the ultimate revolutionary act is telling the truth". Don't tell him what your son told you as this may get him mad at the both of you.<br /><br />The problem with a lie is that it just get's you deeper. Example: If you tell him the motor's blown he can't use it the following may occur.<br /><br />a) He can offer to pay for the repair, what do you do then?<br />b) When he finds out, and he will, that the motor was not blown how much trust do you think there will be then.<br />c) You get the motor repaired and a year later he asks you to use it again. Vicious loop.<br /><br />Whilst you mom you giving your pops the once over investigate the rules of your insurer. This may be your only loophole. You may find that you only have partial cover or you may not be able to tranfer the liability to your pops as the boat's captain. Over here if I wanted my son to drive my car I would need to nominate him as a driver with my insurer first, my premium would change as would the "excess" that I would have to pay. Your insurer may not cover your pops at his age.<br /><br />Finally if all this fails and your good nature does not allow you to say no see if your son has the time. Let him tow the boat to and from the fishing venue and captain it during the entire stay. Might be asking a bit of him though.<br /><br />Good luck<br />Cheers<br />Andrew<br /><br />I'm with Ralph, that in your face honesty sometimes merely pushes people away. As age creeps up on me the definition of diplomacy becomes more and more appropriate. "Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell and making them look forward to the trip" or more appropriately "The art of fishing troubled waters tranquilly".
If it were me, I'd put up with the old cronies for a week and go with him. You may not have the chance next year.<br /> 
